Screenwriting : Another query letter by John Watson

Could someone give me some feedback on this query letter. Is it good enough to send out? Thanks Dear Agent I have just completed a screenplay called VALERY BLOOD that I would like to submit for consideration. Genre: (Paranormal, Drama) LOGLINE: A vampire falls in love with a man married to her brother's captive. Christian Gates, vampire, has broken into the home of Carl Childs taking the wife hostage, then initiating her into the vampire fold.Now, for Carl to gain the power to fight for her, he requests for Christian's sister, Valery, to initiate him too. I attended California State University Long Beach from 1980 to 1982 majoring in English Lit. I have completed several screenplays, one horror film entitled Fason Nou produced by an indie filmmaker. If you are interested in reading the full length screenplay of VALERY BLOOD, please let me know and I will send you a copy of the full script.