Screenwriting : Producer speak by Annie Mac

Can be your personal opinion about your theme.

I find this statement to be pretty direct, not really coded; they are looking for a specific style - ie, they want a dark comedy, but your's has a more 'broad' tone (I've gotten this exact note) - or even as simplistic as "it's sad," when they are looking for upbeat.

polite pass.

It's show business. Bring them more business on the next one (financing, named Actors, Director, distribution, best selling novel adaptations...) Tonality changes fast when you bring leverage.

IMHO it means you told a good story and the setup for the story intrigued them but they were expecting X and got Y.

As an example, take "The American". Many people thought it was a Jason Bourne type movie but when audiences went they found out it was a drama with limited/sparse action. It was all tension. It's good at what it is but it's not the same tone as a Bourne movie.

That's my guess as to what they mean by "tonally" if they didn't expound on it. It just didn't click with what they were looking for/wanted.

Speaking as a producer, they might just think you have a well-written script, an interesting premise, but NOT sellable or commercial enough. They might not feel the audience is big enough (that's not to say it's not, at all, just giving you my opinion.) HOWEVER< instead of getting down, do your homework. Sounds similar to what studios have said about Get Shorty, Pulp Fiction and even Good Will Hunting in the past. ;) One thing I could say for your pitch - even in emails - is to have your audience down pat. KNOW who they are. WHO this script is marketed to. Hope this helps. GOD BLESS and STAY FRESH! ;)

Thanks Sam and Dan. It all makes sense and helps... Leverage

Annie Mac attach Ryan Coogler and see how fast the Producer will call you back :) Good Luck!

In my experience the "Didn't resonate with us tonally" usually means they were expecting or hoping for something different than your script. They may have been looking for a hard driving thriller and your script was more of a drama, or they really want to make a balls-to-the-wall gross-out comedy and your script is more of a dramedy. Producers are in the business of being hopeful. They think that if they can find something close to what they really want they can get the writer to make the changes they're looking for. This is the same with non-writing directors who often have themes that they revisit time after time. They see your logline and think, "Hey that sounds like it could be redemption story." But if it really isn't, then they lose interest.

Don't take it personally. Take the "You have a solid premise and well-executed script" part personally and move on. It sounds like they may be open to reading your next script.

-Steve

A pass is a pass. Accept the ego boosting pat on the back and move along.

Bite the bullet and move forward, without a look back, is that It?

Annie, you've received two compliments: One - A Producer read your script, Two - "you have a solid premise and well-executed script...". The other view is that maybe this Producer's blowing smoke up your skirt for lack of a good provocative hobby. And that's not likely if he's a pro. An example: I don't do blood & guts horror - I don't care how good your story is, how well it's structured & formatted - I don't do horror. And I'm gonna puke on the next vampire script that comes along.

Thank you for those invaluable suggestions, they confirm what I feel all along and do resonate.

Tonality always meant a lot to producers in conversations regarding my scripts. It's also one of the areas of critique by reputable script consultants. I always considered that type of comment that you received as that producer's true feelings about my story's tone, and didn't think there was some other meaning attached to it.

I hear you, Bill. I like to think so too.