It’s a rainy afternoon and I need to get out of the house. I scroll through the movie titles, thirsty for some top notch, rewarding entertainment. Unfortunately, 13 of the 14 movies offered at my local cineplex are total garbage, so I opt for a familiar comedy, SPINAL TAP II: THE END CONTINUES. I have a better subtitle— THE END CAN’T COME FAST ENOUGH.
It’s an 82-minute movie. I laughed 12 times. I glanced at my watch THREE times. And trust me, I LOVE a good comedy. A recent example was THE NAKED GUN, where I laughed 98 times in a mere 85 minutes.
Anyway, back to SPINAL TURKEY. After a promising start, offering funny introductions of the three rock band members, the script completely flatlines. I mean, really? Where’s the conflict expected to propel this comedy forward? I so loved the original 1984 film.
Sadly, this ain’t it. The real problem with these 82 pages is that the band doesn’t really have ANYTHING to do, other than being propped up by music legends Paul McCartney and Elton John in three brief scenes.
McCartney shows up during a very tedious exchange during a music rehearsal, offers nothing, and leaves. John fairs a bit better by actually singing, and yet, the scene remains hollow because the band tends to just sit there, like extras (background actors) in their own movie. The three scenes come across as mere filler in order to add pages to a very light script. This method also comes in handy when the band revisits three songs from the first film.
Anyone else care to share some weak scripts from the big screen that were painfully endured?
It was a rainy afternoon.
I should’ve stayed home.
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I haven't seen Spinal Tap II: The End Continues, Bill Brock, but you pointed out something I think really hurts scripts ("the band doesn’t really have ANYTHING to do"). Even in character-driven scripts, I think the characters need to be doing things, trying to accomplish things, and facing obstacles.
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Maurice Vaughan DON’T BOTHER. I REALLY want my $10.99 back. One big concern is that the band is getting back together to honor ONE concert missed in their contract from 15 years ago, yet not one band member contests it. All three just go along with it. No one complains. Plus, after 15 years, one would think rehearsal would be Job One. Nope. No need. They’re ready to ROCK! Also, the stakes are high enough, so I didn’t care about the characters. Even for comedy, the viewers MUST care. Ughhhhhhhhhhh! What a waste!!
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Maurice Vaughan Correction: The stakes AREN’T high enough.