Hi everyone,
Here’s a short excerpt from my script 84: The Sikh Genocide.
This is a library scene between Jagdeesh and Harpreet, where their unspoken love surfaces through small gestures and words.
INT. UNIVERSITY LIBRARY – LATE AFTERNOON
Golden light filters through the tall windows of the old library.
Harpreet turns to leave— a hand suddenly pulls the books back.
Through the gap, Jagdeesh’s face appears.
His eyes glint, the same arrogant smile— but it flickers, hiding something deeper.
Jagdeesh lifts his wrist, the bracelet catching light.
His words slip out, low, almost tender—
JAGDEESH
I wear your name on my wrist.
Harpreet’s eyes fall on the letter “H.”
For a fleeting moment, a fragile smile rises— then quickly retreats.
Jagdeesh leans closer.
JAGDEESH
Friday... wear yellow. Leave your hair open.
He turns to go. Harpreet’s lips part— her voice barely above a whisper.
HARPREET
...2 November.
Jagdeesh halts. His eyes light up with unguarded joy - for the first time she has spoken to him.
JAGDEESH
(stammering, nodding quickly)
Y... yes.
“I’d really appreciate any feedback on whether the tension and emotional conflict between Harpreet and Jagdeesh comes through effectively in this scene.”
2 people like this
Hi, Sana Chugh. The tension and emotional conflict between Harpreet and Jagdeesh come through effectively. I wondered if this would be the moment they got together as I read the scene, and it's clear they have feelings for each other, but there's clearly something/some things keeping them apart.
3 people like this
"Thank you so much, Maurice! I really appreciate your thoughtful reading. This story is set in 1984, when for Indian youth love and relationships weren’t as openly expressed as today. That’s why I’ve kept a subtle hesitation in their conversations — the feelings are strong, but the social context makes them restrained."
2 people like this
You're welcome, Sana Chugh. Oh ok. It makes more sense now. That impacts the whole story.