Screenwriting : Pitch Feedback by Pink Matzke

Pitch Feedback:

The pitch for The Girl They Didn’t See is emotionally raw, deeply courageous, and powerfully delivered. The writer’s presentation is honest, vulnerable, and controlled. She balances trauma with hope in a way that feels both cinematic and healing. The clarity and pacing of the pitch show clear storytelling discipline: the arc is easy to follow, the emotional beats are well-structured, and the tone maintains authenticity without sensationalism. The idea is both intimate and universally resonant. The framing device of the notebook as a literal and emotional throughline is brilliant and it gives the story structure, metaphor, and catharsis, transforming a survival narrative into an act of reclamation. The tone and references (Room, Precious, The Tale) position the film firmly within the “truth-to-power” genre that has commercial and critical appeal. I recommend highlighting the emotional accessibility for audiences beyond survivors. It would be great to emphasize the universal themes of resilience, identity, and storytelling as a form of liberation could broaden its reach. In development terms, ensuring that secondary characters (like Patricia and Alan) have psychological shading rather than archetypal cruelty would elevate the realism and deepen the emotional impact.