Hi guys, I've just posted my loglines on my profile, all of which have been written. If anyone could jump on and give them a read and comment that would be greatly appreciated!
Screenwriting : Logline Feedback by Liam Lacy
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A key point to loglines is to define the protagonist - what makes him or his situation interesting, and what's at stake - why does he care and why should we. A couple of your loglines provided this. Most didn't.
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Thanks for the tip Mark. I've got some tweaking to do!
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As a rule, loglines should not contain names. They also need to be concise, contain active verbs and give a clear idea of what they story is about. EXAMPLE: A man and woman who are supposed to be sworn enemies form an unlikely coupling after a deadly confrontation between two gangs in an American city, with a slightly French feel. The french feel is confusing and is it actually required? Try this. Sworn enemies are FORCED into an unlikely ALLIANCE, after they are DRAGGED in to a deadly gang war.
Thanks Marvin! I'll continue to tweak them.
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Hey Liam! I was able to read through your loglines. When I'm putting together a logline I try to make sure it has 4 key components: A main character, an opponent, a situation and a goal. As in this example for Avatar: A paraplegic marine (main character) goes to a distant planet and falls in love with a local native alien (situation) and must defend her people in their struggle (goal) against a ruthless mining company (opponent). Hope this helps!
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