Hello guys, I'm new here. I wanted to hear your opinion about the logline of my action/sci-fi/thriller, The Blue Rain Killer. Here it is: "A detective hunts a mastermind serial killer who uses illusions to kill his victims. But the hunter soon becomes prey in a world where reality bends in deadly ways." It is a mind-bender. I appreciate it if anyone would read the script and tell me his opinion. Thanks in advance :)
Screenwriting : Screenplay logline by A. M. Sherif
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I think that is pretty good man. Best of luck with the script and Welcome to stage 32 new member.
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Thanks :)
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Where's the script? Logline is nice, maybe a bit long but it tells a lot. I would want to read it!
Great! I'm currently in the second, or maybe third round of editing. When I'm done, I'll upload it here and let you know.
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Hey A.M., I would invert the sentences and condense a bit. .. In a world where reality bends in deadly ways, a detective hunts a serial killer using illusions to kill his victims and quickly becomes his next target. Something like that. ..... For more, I'm holding a Logline & Query Letter Webinar for Stage 32. Info is here - https://www.stage32.com/webinars/Crafting-Killer-Loglines-Query-Letters-...
Thanks Mr. Danny. I'll check out the link
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Danny's suggestion is excellent. I also recommend typing up 3/5 different loglines and try to tighten up the language and limit it to no more than 30 words. For example, Why do you have to say mastermind serial killer? You could even say detective hunts an illusionist who employs hallucinations to murder his victims. But play with different ways of summarizing your story.