Anything Goes : Trying out new loglines... opinions needed. by Kathryn Zizek

I feel like my head is spinning. Not sure what to focus on. The mother protecting her baby angle or her dealing with the consequences of a mysterious deal.

Kathryn Zizek I keep getting "Rosemary's Baby" vibes from every iteration of the loglines.

Hi, Kathryn Zizek. What about this: After making a mysterious deal as a teenager, a troubled woman fights to protect her baby as she's stalked, tormented, and deceived by a relentless force that has come back to claim its due.

Maurice, you're a genius.

:) Thanks, Kathryn Zizek.

After forging a deal that forces a naive teen to bear a child, the now troubled adult woman battles a relentless evil force stalking her for payment due... her newborn.

E Langley - not bad but the deal doesn't force her to bear a child. Her birth control is tampered with.

I read my logline suggestion again, Kathryn Zizek. I think this sounds better: After making a mysterious deal as a teenager, a troubled woman fights to keep her baby from a relentless force that has come back to claim its due.

That one is snappier but I feel like something's missing. I'll keep playing with it. Thank you for the help. You've definitely put me on the right track!

You're welcome, Kathryn Zizek.

I don’t like “force.” If this is a supernatural spirit or demon, say that. Or “entity” is good.

I was trying to leave it open as its a reveal, in a way. Cult, entity, all in her head... force allows it to be any of those things.

Go with both, they might connect.