Screenwriting : A Man Like Sam by BL Gabriel

BL Gabriel

A Man Like Sam

Hi there. I revised a logline I had posted previously before I plotted out the whole story (see below). I prepared a pitch for it and now I know what is going to happen! I'm excited to continue writing but I value your input on the idea first. Thanks!

P.S. Am I correct in assuming I should not pitch an idea if the script isn't finished? I'm just excited to get feedback on the pitch/idea.

A Man Like Sam

A writer grieving the loss of her dog meets a man with the same name and strikingly similar characteristics. His odd familiarity with her home and his lack of a past propel her to uncover his story which catapults them both into a whole new life.

Maurice Vaughan

A Man Like Sam sounds interesting, BL Gabriel. I think your logline needs more information, mainly the stakes.

Here's a logline template I use: After/when ______ (the inciting incident/the event that sets the plot in motion), a _______ (the main flaw that the main character has to overcome in the script or an adjective that describes the main character’s personality) _______ (the main character’s position/job/career) tries to/attempts to/fights to/struggles to/strives to/sets out to/fights/battles/engages in/competes/etc. _______ (goal of story and try to add the obstacles here) to/so/in order to ________ (stakes).

The inciting incident can also be at the end of the logline: A _______ (the main flaw that the main character has to overcome in the script or an adjective that describes the main character’s personality) _______ (the main character’s position/job/career) tries to/attempts to/fights to/struggles to/strives to/sets out to/fights/battles/engages in/competes/etc. _______ (goal of story and try to add the obstacles here) to/so/in order to ________ (stakes) after/when ______ (the inciting incident/the event that sets the plot in motion).

And Christopher Lockhart has a great webinar on loglines. It’s called “How To Make Your Logline Attractive to A-List Actors, Producers, Directors, Managers, Agents, Financiers and Development Execs” (www.stage32.com/webinars/How-To-Make-Your-Logline-Attractive-to-A-List-A...).

I also suggest waiting until you write the script before pitching. That way you can send the script to the producer/etc. right away when they ask for it.

BL Gabriel

Good point Maurice. Thank you!

Maurice Vaughan

You're welcome, BL Gabriel.

Lori Jones

I would not pitch an unfinished script because characters tend to develope themselves as you write which adds to a more informed and confident pitch. I also agree with Maurice. A logline only needs the protagonist, the goal, and what they are up against to achieve it.

Dan Guardino

I don't know why anyone pays to practice their pitch but personally I wouldn't until it is the screenplay is ready to be read because you have nothing to send them. Plus if they love your pitch they can get someone else to write it.

Matthew Kelcourse

BL Gabriel - there are pitch competitions that will mentor the winners through developing the entire script; but having at least 2 polished scripts before you pitch is the most common thing I hear. Hope that helps. Write on!

Dan MaxXx

Actually most reps/show biz ppl I spoke to want to see loglines, synopsis, treatments, script-ments, whatever you call them- they wanna know the idea/concept before the screenplay.

It's smart managing your Time and get feedbacks. The downside here is $35 per pitch. Drop $350 for ten different feedbacks, and then decide if your idea is worthy to move on to the script!

John Mezes

Hi BL Gabriel. I would always advise a writer to complete a script and have it at the final draft level before pitching. In my experiences and conversations with industry decision-makers, producers and managers can love your pitch, but without a script ready for them to read, you might run the risk of losing their interest.

Also, let's say your pitch is great, and you get a request to read it, and you send them a first draft, mistakes and all, what kind of impression do you think that might leave with them? 50/50 in a best case scenario, but more likely a thought of, " This script isn't ready, and the writer is at a novice stage of development." They might pass on it.

An exec's time and resources are valuable to them, and if you are ready to go with a great pitch based off of a polished script and pitch deck/show bible that you can send them, that is a professional reflection on you, and it moves the relationship dial forward.

If you are a writers room member BL Gabriel, I invite you to attend the Thursday Night Pitch Practice sessions right here on Stage 32 that I co-host and sign up to pitch your idea, but in the meantime, keep writing that script of yours.

BL Gabriel

Great input from you all. I really appreciate it. I remember submitting a logline to the late Blake Snyder (Save the Cat). His response was "the good news is I want to know what happens. The bad news is it isn't in the logline!" I love stage 32. Thank you so much!

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