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84:THE SIKH GENOCIDE
By Sana Chugh
"During the 1984 anti-Sikh riots, a fiery student leader faces a choice: protect the girl he loves or surrendering to mob vengeance- a decision that seals his fate as his love becomes the last reminder of humanity."
SYNOPSIS:
84-The Sikh Genocide unfolds against the backdrop of the 1984 anti-Sikh riots- a night when politics, hatred, and mob violence tore apart India's social fabric.
The story follows Jagdeesh, a fiery young student leader who once preached unity and equality. In the crowd sits Harpreet, a quit Sikh girl who becomes his secret anchor of hope. Their fragile bond is marked by stolen glances and a simple bracelet engraved with an "H".
But after the assassination of Prime Minister Indira Gandhi, Delhi erupts in fire. Streets burn with vengeance , mobs hunt Sikhs, and betrayal poisons neighbors. When Harpreet and her family hide inside their apartment, Jagdeesh returns- not as her protector, but consumed by mob fury. Provoked by his companions, he faces the ultimate choice : protect the girl he loves and her little brother , or surrender to hatred.
The climax unfolds in shadows and silence. Harpreet's is already shattered- her father is dragged out by the mob, a burning tyre forced around his neck as the mob cheers while flames consume him. His body collapse in smoke and fire, leaving only the echo of his last cry. Her younger brother hides inside a wooden trunk, his muffled sobs betraying his fear.
Outside the mob roars louder, demanding Jagdeesh to "prove" his loyalty. Their eyes burns with vengeance, their chants echoing like a death sentence.
Jagdeesh's hand trembles as he clutches the bracelet engraved with "H", a fragile reminder of the love and humanity he once stood for. His face is torn between terror and conscience- the student leader who once a prisoner of his own silence, his own fear.
In that suffocating moment, humanity itself hangs in the balance. Will he honor his words, or drown in the mob's cruelty? The screen fades on his trembling shadow, the bracelet slipping from his palm- leaving the audience to wonder whether Jagdeesh saved love, or surrendered to hatred.
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I like the first part of this logline but get a little lost in the H bracelet comment. I do not know what an H bracelet is. I think you are on the right track.
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thank you so much,David, for your feedback. The 'H' bracelet is a symbolic element in the story--it stands for Harpreet,the girl he loves ,and also for 'Humanity'. I realise now that it may not be clear in the logline itself.I'll try to refine it so that the symbolism does not confuse the reader.Really apreciate your thoughts.
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84: The Sikh Genocide is a gripping Biopic, Sana Chugh!
I think this logline is better. I suggest taking “Harpreet” out of the logline. I think “his love” is enough.
I’m confused by “a choice that seals his fate as his ‘H’ bracelet becomes the last reminder of love and humanity” in the logline. It says “a choice that seals his fate as his ‘H’ bracelet becomes the last reminder of love and humanity” in the synopsis.
Great job on the synopsis overall! I think you could talk about Jagdeesh and Harpreet’s relationship in the synopsis some more, and maybe add more obstacles that Jagdeesh faces.
I also think “The climax unfolds in shadows and silence - the gleam of the bracelet , the slice of steel , beads scattering across the floor” is vague. I suggest adding more details about the climax.
There are some extra spaces before commas in your synopsis I suggest taking out, like at the end of the second paragraph.
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"Thank you so much, Maurice, for such thoughtful feedback! I really appreciate the point about trimming the logline- I'll definitely rework it to make it sharper. Glad you connected with the bracelet and beads symbolism, that means a lot to me. I'll also tighten the synopsis as you suggested. Your guidance is really helping me grow as a writer, so thank you again!"
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"Thank you, Asmaa! I really appreciate your note about simplifying the logline. The "H" bracelet is symbolic in the story, but I see how it might feel distracting in the logline. I'll definitely refine it so that Jagdeesh's central struggle is clearer. Your perspective is very helpful!"
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"Thank you so much for the 4-star rating, Michal! I truly appreciate your time. If you have a moment, I'd love to hear any specific notes that could help me refine the logline further."
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Sana Chugh, Your script holds great potential, not just for the love story, but for the deeper narrative that gives it weight and resonance. The logline is much stronger now. Keep going. I’m cheering you on every step of the way!
You're welcome, @Sana.