The owner's daughter at a Bed and Breakfast tries to solve the non-lethal assaults on her guests over Christmas using her Criminology education before the attacker improves and kills one of them. [Coverage: "Recommended"  Top 2% of Comedy scripts] UNDER EXCLUSIVE SHOPPING AGREEMENT, NO LONGER AVAILABLE]

SYNOPSIS:

ANNIE (22) completed her degree in Criminology before returning to work for her MOM (40s) at the family’s Bed and Breakfast over the stormy Christmas holiday. She’ll need to solve many mysteries overnight because her five guests are all spies lured there for mysterious reasons. BLAKE SMITH (30) is a handsome, shy, honest black man who is immediately smitten with Annie. FIFI JONES (35) is a clumsy French femme fatale who is no Mata Hari. JIMMY SMITH is a weakling James Bond-wannabe from London. GENJI JONES (35) is an easily distracted Chinese kleptomaniac to whom Jimmy is immediately attracted. YURI SMITH (40) looks like a dangerous Russian mastermind but isn’t dangerous and certainly is no mastermind. Fifi falls for Yuri who fails to notice her even in her skimpy black dress.

As the guests gather for complimentary box wine and cheeseballs, Fifi is found unconscious on the lobby floor. Accusations fly and the mistrust among the guests builds like the storm outside. Fifi coughs up a cheeseball, and the suspected poisoning has left her with stomach pains and gas. Later, Blake is found partially strangled leaving him with bouts of spontaneous coughing whenever he tries to be romantic with Annie. Making matters worse, the electricity goes out with only a small generator outside to light up the Christmas tree.

Annie begins investigating the injuries by searching each bedroom as everyone watches from the hallway. They are all masquerading as international salespeople. Jimmy sells dangerous Kitchen Fryers and curiously has an electronic bug detector in his room. A book in Fifi’s room has a sophisticated GPS tracker in it. Blake’s room has an unused camera pen. Genji’s room is full of stolen tiny electronic gadgets. Yuri has a switchblade knife. After Jimmy is drugged with truth serum, Annie becomes more suspicious of their aliases, secretive behavior, and spy equipment. Later, Genji is stabbed in the upper shoulder with an air fryer rotisserie spit rod, implicating Jimmy. All the cases mystify Annie and the others. Annie now keeps the group together in the lobby for everyone’s safety, but Yuri sneaks off to the kitchen and is stabbed in the butt with his own knife.

In the morning, Annie pieces together last night’s events like a seasoned detective. She concludes all the attacks may be warnings for the bungling spies. That’s when Annie’s Mom bursts in to reveal that she, too, is a spy, stunning Annie and the guests. Mom admits to luring the spies to their B&B with color brochures to persuade them to quit the profession. She confesses to attacking the guests to prove they were easy targets for assassins. Mom convinces the inept spies to retire. Annie is driven to become a famous detective, and three new couples, and mom, make it the best Christmas ever.

HOLIDAY FOR SPIES