A hired hit man has a little problem with this loony girl when she refuses to die alone.

SYNOPSIS:

After shooting her in the head and cutting her throat, this loony girl will not cooperate with this hit man and wants him to join her in her death.

A LITTLE MATTER OF MURDER

FADE IN:

EXT. City - Day

We open up on a large city.

EXT. STREET - DAY

Trees line the sidewalk - Cars drive down the street - It's a lazy peaceful day.

ext. sidewalk - day

A half eaten chocolate bar lies on the sidewalk - The roaming ants are enjoying it.

(CAMERA PANS UP TO THE TALL APARTMENT BUILDING)

int. apartment - living room

A MAN comes out of the kitchen wearing black-rimmed glasses and a menacing face - He wipes his bloody hands on a cloth - His hands covered with blood - He looks across the room at the body as he cleans his hands.

A young WOMAN lies on the floor in pajamas - The pajama top soaked in blood.

He strolls over still wiping his hands and glares down at the woman.

A tiny red hole in her forehead - Pajama top covered with blood, and throat cut - Her eyes are fixed.

Man stares down still wiping his hands - He glances up at the window when he hears the honking car.

He strolls to the window and peeks out - The wind blows his hair around.

ext. window - day

Man peeks down out of the window.

EXT. SIDEWALK - DAY

Down below, an elderly LADY is walking her DOG on the sidewalk.

INT. APARTMENT - LIVING ROOM

Man hears a noise from behind and quickly turns around - The mutilated woman stands staring at him.

MAN

Yikes!

He jumps back holding out his hands to keep her away.

WOMAN

Just look at what you've done?

He holds his hands out.

MAN

Nothing personal, it was just a job.

WOMAN

Just look at my pajama top. I'll never get all that blood out.

MAN

Would you like to sit down?

WOMAN

I look awful.

Man frowns at the nasty wound.

MAN

You really need to get that fixed.

GIRL

Just look at my throat. I can't go out looking like this.

MAN

Maybe you could get a scarf? Sears and Roebuck is having a sale.

GIRL

I really prefer Walmart.

MAN

Oh, I'm sure they'll have them too. You're bleeding a lot. Maybe you need to see your doctor?

GIRL

That will be a trick. He had a heart attack last week. I'll have to dig him up to see him.

MAN

You may not be aware, but there is other doctors.

GIRL

Not as cheap as he was. I don't know how I can explain this to my brothers.

MAN

Did you say brothers?

GIRL

Yes, all ten of them.

MAN

You're father must be very active.

GIRL

Are you married?

MAN

Oh no, but I do have a girlfriend.

GIRL

What's her name?

MAN

Lorita Snotgrass.

GIRL

That's a strange name.

MAN

Well, what can you do. She's stuck with it.

GIRL

You're kinda cute in a crude way.

MAN

Thank you. You're bleeding again. Would you like to use my rag?

GIRL

Did you blow your nose in it?

MAN

Oh no, I used my shirt.

He hands her the bloody rag, and she dabs the bloody pajama top.

GIRL

I had a hot date tonight. You just blew my evening.

MAN

Well, if you had cooperated with me we wouldn't have this little problem.

GIRL

Do you do this often?

MAN

Every chance I get. The money is good.

He makes a face and holds his stomach.

MAN

Oh no. I know this is not the time for this, but I need to use the bathroom.

WOMAN

What is wrong with you?

MAN

Number two.

WOMAN

Oh, okay. But make it snappy.

MAN

Oh, I will.

He gallops to the bathroom and slams the door shut.

Thirty minutes later, she sits on the couch, legs crossed, smoking a cigarette - She glances at the clock on the wall.

Clocks reads: 10:30

She makes a frown and takes another drag.

The bathroom flushes and she crushes the cigarette out and stands up.

He comes out of the bathroom wearing a smile.

WOMAN

I hope everything came out all right.

MAN

Oh yes, it did.

WOMAN

Do you wear those glasses all the time?

MAN

Only when I want to see.

WOMAN

To get back to our conversation, how long have you been slitting throats?

MAN

Four years now.

WOMAN

You must have cut a lot of throats.

MAN

A bunch.

WOMAN

How much do you charge to slit a throat?

MAN

It's negotiable.

GIRL

Can you give me a hint?

MAN

I rather not.

GIRL

Is it a secret?

MAN

Well, if you must know, if my competition knew my rates they would undercut me.

GIRL

It's a cut throat world out there.

MAN

You hit the hammer right on the head.

GIRL

Where's my phone?

MAN

I cut the cord. I usually do that when I cut throats.

GIRL

Do you have a cell phone?

MAN

Yes, I do.

GIRL

Can I make a call?

MAN

Sure, just don't run up my minutes.

He hands her his cell phone.

GIRL

I am so forgetful, do you have the number to the police station?

He takes the cell phone back.

MAN

Wait just a minute. Why do we want to call the police?

GIRL

Today is my father's birthday. I need to wish him happy birthday.

MAN

He's a policeman?

GIRL

He's a homicide detective to be exact.

MAN

Well, what do you know? I'm out of minutes.

GIRL

You can pay on line.

MAN

I don't have a credit card.

GIRL

You can use mine.

MAN

Oh no, I wouldn't want to put you out. I've got a great idea. Why don't I run down to the drug store and pick up some bandages and some chewing gun.

GIRL

I have a suspension you don't like me.

MAN

Well, it is easier to slit a throat when you don't like someone.

GIRL

So now it's all coming out. You don't like me at all.

MAN

Would you like something to eat?

GIRL

This happens to me all the time. I can't keep a boyfriend. What's wrong with me?

MAN

Right now, a lot.

GIRL

I might as well end it all.

man

You know, I was thinking this very thing.

GIRL

I hate to go alone. I don't make friends easily. Would you like to come along with me?

MAN

Thank you for the offer, but I think I'll stick around a little while longer.

He places his cell phone in his pocket.

GIRL

I think you and I should take a little flight this afternoon.

MAN

Could you explain that a little better?

GIRL

I'll do more then that, sweetie, I'll show you.

She dashes toward him holding her hands out to push him through the window.

MAN

(shouts)

Wait just a minute. Let's talk this O-V-E-R....

He screams as the woman shoves him through the window.

ext. window - apartment - day

They both burst through the window in SLOW MOTION.

EXT. SIDEWALK - DAY

The elderly lady holding the leash on the dog quickly looks up in horror - Her eyes follow the screaming man and woman to the sidewalk - a loud thump when they hit the sidewalk and the screaming abruptly stops - Elderly lady bends over and stares down at them.

elderly LADY

Are you all right?

The woman lies on top of man with her fingers clutched around his throat - Man has fingers wrapped around her wrists. He turns to elderly lady with tears in his eyes.

MAN

What a stupid question, oh,ooo....

He moans and turns his head.

Elderly lady and dog glare down at him with eyes wide open.

ELDERLY LADY

Would you like a hot dog?

FADE OUT: